NES RATING #3 - Wolverine

NES RATING #3

Wolverine

Produced by:  Software Creations

Distributed by:  LJN

Released:  October 1991

With comic book popularity reaching a “boom” period in the early 1990’s, leave it to our friends at LJN to capitalize and release Wolverine for the NES.  And what better character for a video game?  Great cast of villains?  Check.  Near "impervious to pain" hero that can take tons of hits from enemies?  Check.  The perfect video game was here!

Sadly, it wasn’t this one.  The point of this game?  Charge kids $50 for an outright lazy effort featuring Wolverine on the box.

Besides the horrendous music, the first noticeable problem with Wolverine is that it’s just too difficult.  As you hop from platform to platform in search of the end-of-level doorway, you’ve got enemies appearing out of thin air, projectiles flying everywhere, and the only weapon to start, your claws, drains your life by just swinging them.  Even if you practice just hitting the button, your energy depletes.  Wow, what a realistic game starring Wolverine, a character that’s tank-like and has healing abilities that even diehard fans think are a bit too much.

You’ll learn quickly that instead of clawing (or even punching) enemies, you’ll stand a much better chance of surviving by running for your life, dodging them, and basically being a coward… which sounds nothing like a Wolverine video game.  This game is sort of like Ninja Gaiden, except with awful music and you can’t actually attack your enemies.  And you have no great weapons, projectile-based or hand-held.  Okay, so it’s the exact opposite of that game.  But you can run and jump a lot and maybe make it to the end of a level.  Thrilling.

Power-ups include gigantic hamburgers and soda.  Yes, Wolverine loves throwin’ back them sodas!  I wonder if they’re diet, to add with the game’s theme of general nonsense.

So overall, this game offers very little enjoyment.  Where are the villains?  A brief tiny screenshot of Sabretooth informing you about the next terrible level’s theme is all you get.  Magneto appears in the 10^th level.  He’s incredibly difficult, and after you beat him you deal with Sabretooth.  Hours before this, of course, you deal with the endless supply of generic villains from every video game ever.  Watch out for those guys in t-shirts and disappearing white blob robots.  Yawn.

The diehard X-Men fan in me actually positively influences the rating a bit.  Stay away.

Rating:  D-